NYC Single Mom’s Quest – Technology Rehab

Originally posted March 08, 2010 on NYC Momsblog

Being an early adopter of technology has never been my raison d’etre. I could careless if I have the latest gadget. At my last job (before I was laid off,) I was not issued a blackberry because the company was doing so poorly and company phones were considered an unnecessary expense. I was thrilled. I did not mind working late but I had no interest in being accessible 24/7 just to answer emails.

And from a personal perspective, I was still holding onto my Motorola razr phone until the summer of 2009. That meant, I was hardly ever checking personal emails or surfing the ‘net because the screen was so small.

After I was laid off and decided to start my website,www.nyccitysinglemom.com and then began writing for NYCMomsblog (which is no longer around) I knew I needed a more current phone. So I drank the iPhone kool-aid and purchased one, gaining access to the cool kids club

I am not sure if it was the blog, or the job search or having a new phone that led me down the path of technology addiction. Out of nowhere, I ended up with 5 email addresses to manage.

1. Personal email for friends
2. Job search email
3. Blog dedicated email
4. RSS email to follow all the cool bloggers I have made friends with or ones I have discovered over the last year
5. Email dedicated for all the social media sites I have to join to manage my sites

On top of all the emails I am constantly checking, I am now obsessed with posting on Twitter, Facebook, whrrl.com, and checking gossip and news sites.

It’s insane. It would be one thing if I was doing all this during the day when my daughter is in school or camp but I continue checking once we arrive home from school.  That means, I am constantly on my iPhone or computer while my daughter is doing her homework, taking a bath, watching television, you get the idea. I am lucky I can get food on the table.

I even found myself checking emails and tweeting during her dance recital. Goodness gracious, I am supposed to be watching her dance not communicating with the outside world.

But finally, reality came a crashing. After the dance recital, my daughter came up to me and said, “I saw you looking at your iPhone. Mommy, you are addicted to your iPhone and the computer.  It’s really disrespectful that you are not looking at me while I dance.” She, of course, said it all in this disapproving tone while giving me that a sad, disappointed face.

I, of course, agreed.  What else could I do? She was right.

So I have made a commitment to NOT look at my iPhone and computer until after my daughter is asleep. It is my goal to be as in the moment as I can.

We will see. Like any bad habit or addiction, it takes time and constant awareness to manage one’s behavior.  I have to try, because I love hearing the excitement in my daughter’s voice when she tells me about her day and all that she learned. If I don’t change my behavior now, come the tween/teen years, I will only be hearing about her day via text or email because she that’s what she learned as a child

Update: So how am I doing since I posted this back in March. Better but not by much. Hey, bad habits are hard to break but little by little I am trying to live in the moment.

Category: Single Mom Daily Life